Tubby Terrorist: I'm Starving!

May I recommend the roast pork loin deep-fried in bacon grease?

You've got to love the headline.

HUNGRY HIPPO HAMZA’S LIST OF PRISON DEMANDS

This fat bastard may even outweigh that slob Dougie Hooper.

OVERWEIGHT preacher of hate Abu Hamza has given prison officials a list of demands after telling his lawyer: “I’m starving in here.”

Hamza, 49, who weighs about 20 stone, has told jail chiefs he wants more and better food, extra phone time and an end to constant strip searches.

The former imam of Finsbury Park Mosque in north London, who is fighting extradition to the US, also objects to squatting during searches as it contravenes Islamic law.

Hamza, who has hooks after losing both hands, is serving seven years at Belmarsh prison in south London for soliciting the murder of non-Muslims and inciting racial hatred.

A dossier of complaints compiled by his solicitors states: “He receives insufficient food which appears to be out-of-date and does not meet his dietary requirements.


“He has been left in a room without adequate facilities to meet the needs of a disabled person. This included no heads on taps so he did not have access to cold water and didn’t have his diabetic pack.”

His team at Arani Solicitors claims Hamza was strip searched 13 times in one day, making him feel “degraded”.

The statement reads: “On one occasion, Shaykh Abu Hamza was strip searched 13 times during the period 8am to 5pm in one day alone.

“Many Muslims will be aware that strip searches and other degrading practices, such as squatting, are against Islam.”

Hamza also complained to his lawyers that he does not have enough phone credit – making it impossible for him to prepare his legal defence.

The statement says: “His telephone credit was also confiscated, denying him the right to prepare for his court hearing adequately.”

Inmates of the category A jail, which houses some of Britain’s most dangerous prisoners, have branded Hamza the “Hungry Hippo” because of his vast bulk. A prison insider said: “It was a label which instantly stuck – he’s a big man and everyone knows him for wearing that grey outfit. When word got round that he was moaning about being hungry, it seemed an obvious title.”

My heart goes out to anyone in his presence when he was strip-searched.

H/T Shiplord Kirel.