Memo to Liberals: Thumb-Sucking Clinic Now Open

You'll have to leave to country to go there, but that's a plus for the rest of us.

"We know that children suck their thumb because it has a pleasurable, soothing sensation," said Dr Joffe.

"If you are too harsh in trying to break one habit in a child, the risk is that you cause a whole new habit – maybe a more difficult one, such as bed-wetting. The psychology of it can be difficult.

As to the bed-wetting liberals, I recommend some Depends.