That Sweet Smell of New Jersey

A mystery that has baffled New Yorkers for years has finally been solved. Naturally, it New Jersey's fault. Normally when you something something sweet you appreciate it and move about your business. But no, not in Michael Bloomberg's nanny-state.

City officials have finally sniffed out the cause of a mysterious maple syrup-like smell that has filled the Manhattan air for the past five years - a New Jersey facility that processes flavors and fragrances.

"Given the evidence, I think it's safe to say that the 'Great Maple Syrup Mystery' has finally been solved," Mayor Bloomberg said today at City Hall.

The sweet odor - which has been deemed harmless - has wafted across the city on and off since 2005.

"The Health Department confirmed that the odor does not pose a health risk, but I am pleased to know that our ... smelling sleuths got to the bottom of this mystery," Bloomberg said.

It's governmental genius like this that we just can't have enough of. Which is probably why King Bloomberg has rewritten the rules to install himself for a third term.

Watch him explain how the sleuths uncovered the mystery.



I love some of the comments at the story link.

Baron Van Awesome wrote:
5 Years to find a pancake smell right across the river ?

Should have tried rolling down the windows of that bullet proof SUV you drive around in.

With this time and action no wonder you need a 3rd term.

magoo wrote:
Excellent job, Mr. Little Pants! Now investigate that huge sucking sound coming from all the jobs and people leaving NYC. Those who are left will have to make up for it by paying more in taxes, fares, tolls,and bogus summonses!