High Comedy: Democrats Taking 'Green' Convention to Absurd Extremes

The contortions these people have to go through to pretend they give a rat's ass about the environment. Outside the convention will be every stripe of human debris fouling the senses, but inside the huddled masses gathering for the coronation of King Obama will be secretly dying for some french fries.

Just get a load of this nonsense.

As the Mile High City gears up to host a Democratic bash for 50,000, organizers are discovering the perils of trying to stage a political spectacle that's also politically correct.

Consider the fanny packs.

The host committee for the Democratic National Convention wanted 15,000 fanny packs for volunteers. But they had to be made of organic cotton. By unionized labor. In the USA.

Official merchandiser Bob DeMasse scoured the country. His weary conclusion: "That just doesn't exist."

Ditto for the baseball caps. "We have a union cap or an organic cap," Mr. DeMasse says. "But we don't have a union-organic offering."

Even the food has to be color-coordinated and organic.

But Matt Burns, a spokesman for the Republican convention, looks on with undisguised glee at some of the Democrats' efforts -- such as the "lean 'n' green" catering guidelines.

Among them: No fried food. And, on the theory that nutritious food is more vibrant, each meal should include "at least three of the following colors: red, green, yellow, blue/purple, and white." (Garnishes don't count.) At least 70% of ingredients should be organic or grown locally, to minimize emissions from fuel burned during transportation. "One would think," says Mr. Burns, "that the Democrats in Denver have bigger fish to bake -- they have ruled out frying already -- than mandating color-coordinated pretzel platters."

Democrats say the point is to build habits that will endure long after the convention. To that end, the city has staged "greening workshops" attended by hundreds of caterers, restaurant owners and hotel managers. "It's the new patriotism," Mayor Hickenlooper says.

About the only thing tolerable I can find in the story is they hired a very nice-looking environmental wacko to be the--get this--Director of Greening, one Andrea Robinson (photo).

Poor thing has her work cut out for her.

The joke is on the Democrats. They're too brainwashed to even realize all their efforts are for naught. That's right, it's all meaningless. Just feel-good, PC pap. But they get to bask in self-congratulation, knowing they're better than us, and that's what it's all about.

Then they'll rush back to their hotel room and scarf down a plate of green french fries.