Early Frontrunner for Father of the Year

I was tempted to crack a cheap joke about this guy's resemblance to a certain husky, ponytailed blogger, but that's beneath me. Then I noticed the part about him checking himself in for psychiatric evaluation and figured it was worth noting the eerie likeness. Maybe it's the unkempt hair, chubby cheeks and glazed eyes.

A Kentucky man was so high and drunk that he used his kitchen oven as a crib for his 5-week-old infant.

Luckily, dope-smoking, whiskey-chugging Larry Long left the door of the oven ajar and didn’t turn it on, so the tot was okay, even after a long dark night, said McCracken County Sheriff Jon Hayden.

Authorities told CNN that after smoking marijuana at the restaurant where he works as a cook, Long, 33, returned home to share a fifth of whiskey with the baby’s mother, Brandy Hatton.

Hatton had four or five shots and went to bed while Long finished the bottle, Hayden said.

At 5:30 the next morning, Hatton awoke to the sound of the baby’s cries coming from the oven. He had been in it for several hours, police said, according to CNN.

Emergency crews responding to the scene took the infant to a local hospital, where he was found to be unharmed.

The incident was reported to authorities by a psychiatric facility that Long turned to when he learned what he had done, officials said.

“He actually called a mental health crisis line immediately thereafter and told them that he had done this. And they contacted us,” Hayden said.

Police arrested Long and charged him with first degree wanton endangerment. He is being held on bail of $10,000.

Pity the poor child if it's ever again left in the "care" of these feral beasts.