Heartbreak: Splitsville for Grating Hollywood Pinheads

Sorry to burden you this festive season with the sad news.

It was the love story that defied most of Hollywood's short-lived relationships– until now.

Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins have split up after more than two decades together, People.com reports.

"Actress Susan Sarandon and her partner of 23 years, actor Tim Robbins have announced that they separated over the summer," the actress' rep Teal Cannaday said in a statement. "No further comments will be made."

Sarandon, 63, and Robbins, 51, who first met while filming the 1988 romantic comedy "Bull Durham," has never married.

Knowing these two the breakup was probably a result of a dispute over the public option.

It's Love for Hugo

Don't they make a happy-looking couple?

Courtney Love is still floating on the charm offensive that Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez launched at Wednesday's screening of Oliver Stone's new documentary, "South of the Border." The singer, who came dressed to thrill in a short zipper-front skirt, says she noticed the twice-divorced Chavez checking her out during a Q&A afterward.

"It was the third wink that sold me," Mrs. Kurt Cobain told us. "He's a sexy dawg. He invited me to visit his country and I'd like to go. I'll rock Caracas!"

I know Love has ingested enough drugs to last ten lifetimes, but Chavez is sexy?

Ugh.

The ebullient, espresso-sipping Chavez also had smooches and smiles for Susan Sarandon, Danny Glover, Shia LaBeouf and Carey Mulligan. But, when we asked him about his feelings for Barack Obama, he admitted to mixed emotions.

Maybe they can all relocate to Venezuela.

Hot Air links. Thanks!

Kevorkian: The Movie

Al Pacino as Dr. Death. Go figure.

Say hello to my little death machine!

Susan Sarandon and John Goodman are set to co-star opposite Al Pacino in "You Don't Know Jack," HBO Films' biopic of Jack Kevorkian, which is being directed by Barry Levinson.

Kevorkian, known as Dr. Death, assisted in more than 130 suicides. After willingly sending a videotape of himself euthanizing a terminally ill man to "60 Minutes," he was convicted in 1999 of second-degree murder and spent eight years in prison before getting paroled in 2007.

Loosely based on Neal Nicol and Harry Wylie's book "Between the Dying and the Dead: Dr. Jack Kevorkian's Life and the Battle to Legalize Euthanasia," the HBO film follows Kevorkian's (Pacino) rise as he builds his infamous Mercy Machine and sets out to perform assisted suicides while waging an epic legal battles defending a patient's right to die.

Goodman will play Nicol, a friend and co-worker of Kevorkian since 1961 and a steadfast supporter of the right to die.

Nicol's medical training as a corpsman and laboratory technician enabled him to assist Kevorkian on many occasions, while his laboratory supply company often provided materials for Kevorkian's efforts.

The annoying Sarandon plays--wait for it--an activist!

What a stretch.

Sarandon will play Janet Good, an activist with the Hemlock Society who becomes one of Jack's staunchest supporters, working side by side with him to make humane suicide available to the terminally ill and suffering. After she is herself diagnosed with terminal cancer, she avails herself of Kevorkian's services, choosing her own time to die, surrounded by her friends and loved ones.

Maybe someone can euthanize her career.

'There Really Only Needs to be One Star in Grant Park, and That's Barack'

It's a good thing Grant Park is an outdoor venue. Otherwise I doubt they'd be able to fit Obama's ego in.

Probably a good idea to keep the Hollywood nitwits away. If Obama loses and all hell breaks loose (a good possibility, apparently), they might get trampled and be unable to remain as functioning useful idiots.

It's probably not surprising that a lot of Barack Obama's biggest celebrity supporters -- both from Hollywood and the music world -- were clamoring for VIP invites to tonight's big rally in Grant Park.

While the Democratic nominee and his staff are thankful for both the big checks and outspoken expressions of support from all those famous faces, I've learned from a key Obama insider that a number of big-time boosters have been told politely -- but very firmly -- to stay away tonight.

Reportedly, Jay-Z, Mary J. Blige, Sean ''Diddy'' Combs, Susan Sarandon, Tim Robbins and Ben Affleck are among those advised to skip the Chicago festivities and focus on attending the expected Obama inauguration in January.

''There really only needs to be one star in Grant Park, and that's Barack,'' said the source, a high-profile elected official who spoke on the condition of anonymity, since he's not authorized to speak for the campaign on this issue.

''There will be plenty of time for a new President Obama to be surrounded by famous fans, all hopeful about a new administration.''

It curious that Democrats do everything they can to avoid having their fraudulent voters not show photo ID, but yet to get into Obamarama tonight, you need a photo ID. Funny how that works.

Q: I HAVE a ticket. What should I bring and not bring?

A: Print and bring your ticket and a photo ID. You'll be directed where to go at the entrance on Congress. You WON'T be allowed to bring chairs, coolers, alcohol, strollers or any bag bigger than a woman's purse. No mention was made of cell phones, cameras or handheld camcorders, but they're probably okay if they're small. Children can come without a ticket if they're small enough to carry, said Chicago Office of Emergency Management and Communication executive director Ray Orozco. But it will be standing room only at an event that lasts several hours.

Remarkably, someone has thought the unthinkable.

Q: What if Obama loses?

A: Anything can happen. The Obama campaign says the senator will still address the crowd from Grant Park. Police say they're prepared for crowd control and to face tens of thousands of very disappointed supporters.

Those are code words for rioting will commence and the Second Great Chicago Fire will be underway.

More Hollywood Imbeciles Threaten To Flee If Messiah Loses

This morning we brought you the disturbing news that British citizen Seal would be departing if The Chosen One manages to blow the election. Now comes word another batch of the usual suspects are gassing up their private luxury jets and are ready to depart for parts unknown should they not get their way.

Funny thing is, they're all probably secretly sheltering their fortunes off shore in the knowledge that Obama will be milking them dry.

A HIDEOUS new affliction is creeping through the ranks of America's creative community.

The further Barack Obama edges ahead of John McCain in the million and one polls that are coming out the more pernicious the nagging fear becomes.

What if he loses?

Barely a left-wing pundit, barely an Oscar-nominated softie can sleep a wink these days for fear of the race riots and international humiliation that will ensue should "The One" be defeated on Tuesday.

They think he's going to win, of course, but their hearts still bear the scars of 2000 and 2004.

Yet they're all still here, making their lousy movies and uttering their bilge despite the rampant fears that the evil Bush was going to impart the chill wind of censorship.

But for others, the dread is nameless and paralysing. Erica Jong, author of the 1970s feminist bible Fear of Flying, has developed a new complex in recent weeks - the fear of an Obama flogging.

"If Obama loses it will spark the second American Civil War. Blood will run in the streets, believe me," she told the Italian newspaper Corriere della Sera last week. "My back is also suffering from spasms, so much so that I had to see an acupuncturist and get prescriptions for Valium.

"Yesterday, Jane Fonda sent me an email to tell me that she cried all night and can't cure her ailing back for all the stress that has reduced her to a bundle of nerves."

Geez, what a bunch of basketcases. Are they so damn immature they can't handle John McCain? Good grief, people, get a grip.

Crack teams of chiropractors are at the ready, and Nissen huts full of qualified shrinks and aromatherapists line Rodeo Drive to soothe the tortured brigades of the psychologically wounded should "The One" be robbed of victory.

Then, of course, there's the perpetually angry Susan Sarandon issuing threats to leave, as if there's a phalanx of fans somehow trying to block her departure.

Actress Susan Sarandon has already issued a veiled threat to the public.

"It's a critical time, but I have faith in the American people," she told Britain's Telegraph newspaper with a touch of implied menace in June this year. "If they prove me wrong, I'll be checking out a move to Italy. Maybe Canada, I don't know. We're at an abyss …"

Sarandon's words qualify her for membership of a small but committed group of Potential Canadians (PCs) in American artistic and creative circles.

Barbra Streisand vowed to emigrate to Canada in 2000 if George Bush were ever elected President, an undertaking she refreshed four years later at the prospect of his re-election.

And yet these blithering idiots are still here, issuing meaningless threats, but at least keeping chiropractors and psychiatrists with booming business.

The actor Alec Baldwin and Pearl Jam's Eddie Vedder made similar threats in 2000, as did Robert Redford in 2004, but none has since enriched the Canadian cultural scene.

In fact, Canadian immigration records show that arrivals from the United States actually slowed in the six months after George Bush's re-election in 2004.

Yeah, there were probably Canadians emigrating here, seeking to enjoy the freedoms these addle-brained hypocrites fail to take advantage of.