'It Was Really Scary, Really Frightening'

Just what we need, another group of victims.

What, pray tell is so frightening and scary? Why, the thought of having sex.

No, this isn't a joke.

In a society obsessed with sex, David Jay wants no part of it.

Jay, a 26-year-old graduate student at the Presidio School of Management in San Francisco, acknowledges that his lack of interest in sex may seem unusual to many who view intercourse as the epitome of intimacy.

But research suggests that about 1 percent of the population may share Jay's view on sex. And he said that for many of these people, coming to terms with their feelings about sex can be a major challenge.

"When I was younger, the message I would always hear is that you need sex to be happy," he said. "I realized probably around the age of 14 or 15 that all of my friends were actively talking about sex. I just couldn't relate to it; I had no interest at all."

Yeah, well, that might not seem all that unusual at that age when some kids might be such dorks incapable of having a relationship or knowing what to do, but at some point might you just get the urge? Maybe I'm the crazy one with the raging hormones unabated after all these years.

Nah. Seems to me these guys are just closet cases unable to comes to grips with rejection or able to handle an intimate relationship. Or maybe they were neutered at a young age and have repressed memory.

But hey, I'm not a professional shrink, just a guy who digs the ladies.

Jay said that it took him about four years of struggling to adjust to the fact that he simply did not view sex in the same way as most other people.

"It was really scary, really frightening," Jay said. "I think that throughout the asexual community, there are a lot of people who really start in that place of being isolated and confused."

Now they want asexuality classified as a sexual orientation. Seriously.

Recently, Jay and others within AVEN began lobbying for greater understanding of asexuality among the psychological community as well. Their message is simple: they want increased recognition of asexuality among psychological professionals -- while ensuring that it is seen as a legitimate sexual orientation rather than diagnosed as a mental illness.
...
"Because asexuality is a relatively new phenomenon that has been described -- not that it hasn't existed for many, many centuries -- people don't understand what it is," Brotto said. "Because most people can identify with the feeling of sexual attraction, the notion that someone would not have sexual attraction toward anyone seems bizarre."

Indeed, it does.

Still, there's hope. Jay could get the hell out of San Francisco and move where some normal people are. Or better yet, find others like himself.

Another option, of course, is for those who are asexual to form relationships with each other. Jay said that there is an emerging asexual dating scene, and some online dating services geared toward asexuals have appeared.

What is an asexual relationship like? Jay likened it to an intimate partnering of "very, very close best friends."

Ace links. Thanks! And needless to say, get over there and enjoy the comments.