Great News: Bumbling Biden Definitely on 2012 Ticket

Four more years ... of gaffes and malaprops! Assuming the public actually elects this disastrous duo again.

Bad news Hillary: Vice President Joe Biden isn't going anywhere.

Despite speculation that Biden and Hillary Clinton will swap jobs next year so the Secretary of State can be President Obama's running mate in 2012, Biden said the President has already asked him to run along side him again, a source confirmed with the Daily News.

"I tell you what, there's real trust, that's why he's asked me to run again," Biden dropped to the New York Times at the end of 40-minute interview on Tuesday. "Look, he said, 'We're going to run together, are you going to run?' I said, 'Of course, you want me to run with you, I'm happy to run with you.' "

The rumors have been swirling for months, coinciding with Obama plummeting in the popularity polls. The theory was that Biden—a former chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee—really wanted to work solely on foreign policy.

In the meantime, Clinton would reenergize frustrated Democrats and independents—especially Latinos and women—by running for vice president.

Really? Where do they reach this assumption the Latino vote would flock to them with her on the ticket? Is there some special tie with them? They're already abandoning Obama as it is, so why would she be some magnetic draw? Is it the pantsuits?

Biden, meanwhile, tells us Democrats aren't running in droves from Obama because of his record of incompetence. It's just they're so gosh darned successful it's too difficult to explain to the great unwashed. Better to just smear the Chamber of Commerce, I guess.