Friday, January 09, 2009

Drunken Degenerate Gambler Takes Leave of Absence

Round Mound of Beclowned
Good career move, Chuckles, trolling for hookers while twice the legal limit.
Charles Barkley will take a leave of absence from Time Warner Inc.’s TNT network after the basketball analyst was arrested on suspicion of driving under the influence of alcohol last week.

The National Basketball Association Hall-of-Fame player was pulled over by a law enforcement task force after he ran a stop sign in Scottsdale, Arizona, at 1:27 a.m. local time, according to a report issued by the Gilbert Police Department.

Barkley, 45, declined to take a breath test. He instead was given a blood test. Tests were completed today, revealing a blood alcohol content of .149 -- almost twice the state limit of .08, according to a news release by the Gilbert Police Department.

“When I spoke with Charles, he was apologetic for the events that transpired and it was obvious he understood the significance of this situation,” David Levy, president of Turner Sports, said in an e-mail.
Yeah, and after a couple weeks of sobriety, they'll be happy to put this lowlife back on the air.

All this because the guy was in a hurry to get a blowjob.
According to the officer who wrote the report, "He told me that he ran the stop sign because he was in a hurry to pick up the girl I saw get in the passenger seat."

The officer continues: "He asked me to admit that she was 'hot.' He asked me, 'You want the truth?' When I told him I did he said, 'I was gonna drive around the corner and get a b**w job. He then explained that she had given him a 'b**w job' one week earlier and said it was the best one he had ever had in his life."
When we last noticed this fat slob, he was admitting he pissed away $10 million gambling, including $100,000 on the Super Bowl last year.

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