Your Objective Media at Work: CNN Chronicles the 'Meanest Budget Cuts'

We could argue it would be mean to permanently saddle our children with trillions in deficits, but hey, why deal with reality when they can carry water for the Democrats?

Community health centers serve about 20 million people at 7,000 locations around the country. They primarily cater to those without health insurance.

Under the budget deal agreed to by Congress Thursday, the centers would see their funding slashed by $600 million for the remainder of 2011.

A Democrat staffer on the Senate Appropriations Committee said the cuts aren't as bad as they seem. In fact, he said that under the sweeping health care legislation passed last year, the centers will actually see a $400 million increase in funding.

So in CNN's world, a $400 million increase in funding is one of the meanest budget cuts.

Nothing like coming in with a preconceived story line and diligently sticking with it.

Next up is landmine removal. We're not the ones planting them, but apparently getting rid of them is on our dime.

The country is also the largest donor to projects that attempt to find and remove these deadly weapons. It funnels some $80 million to $100 million a year toward the cause, according to Zach Hudson, director of the U.S. Campaign to Ban Landmines and Cluster Bombs.

The budget deal cuts funding to the State Department program that oversees land mine removal by $14 million a year.

The program also funds anti-terrorism and non-proliferation efforts oversees. It's not clear if the $14 million in cuts will come out of the land mine program's budget. If they do, Hudson said it would be "detrimental."

So they have no idea if a marginal cut from the $80 to $100 million being spent will actually happen, but if it does it would be detrimental.

So far we're at at least a $386 million spending increase, but damn, are those budget cuts that aren't happening really, really mean.

Now we have food stamps, and we all know how desperate Democrats are to keep people dependent on government. And of course it would be incredibly mean to keep people on the dole away from stuffing their faces with junk food.

The program served 9.1 million people in 2009 and had a 2010 budget of $7.3 billion.

A Senate Democrat staffer on the Appropriations Committee said the reduction is a result of fewer people needing the program.

The agency noted that the final cut was actually less than President Obama proposed.

So fewer people need the program, Obama proposed cutting more, but those Republicans are just being mean.

They're batting .000 after three tries. Let's see if they can actually find some real meanness.

How about heat for poor people?

The contingency budget is supposed to be used for unforeseen costs, like rising oil prices. The fund's main budget of $4.5 billion was unchanged from last year's level.

Supporters of the cuts note that this year's heating season is over, so it's unlikely the contingency funds will be needed.

So there are no cuts, but it's one of their meanest budget cuts? Huh? Is there anyone in charge at CNN that realizes this isn't quite going as planned? But wait, instead of freezing to death, they may sweat to death!

Critics say some of the money is also spent on air conditioning costs, and a disaster that causes energy prices to surge could happen at any time.

So a disaster could happen, oh, whenever, so let's just keep adding more money.

Just in case.

If you're keeping score at home, CNN is now 0 for 4. But they keep trying. Which bring us to housing assistance for Native Americans. Heck, I'm a native of America and I don't get any housing assistance.

Where's mine?

Lawmakers cut $50 million from the fund that provides housing assistance to Native Americans, bringing the budget for those programs down to $650 million.

A Senate Democrat staffer on the appropriations committee noted the funding was actually $70 million above what Obama requested.

So the heartless Obama apparently proposed cutting $120 million, but the evil GOP left it at a $50 million cut.

Oh, the humanity!

At this point, shouldn't CNN be taking Obama to task for his meanness?

Up next is a program you've likely never heard of and, honestly, is completely useless. The U.S. Institute for Peace. Silly me. I thought our military was there to enforce the peace.

This program aims to be a "catalyst for empowering others to prevent, manage and resolve international conflict without resorting to violence," according to its website.

As well all know the left has done so much to bring peace to the world; it's unimaginable how they'll be able to scrape by on $40 million this year. Just what we need more of: conflict resolution and dialogue.

Finally, there's old people, and as well all know, Republicans just want them all to die.

This agency, which helps senior citizens navigate the maze of federal bureaucracy and maintain independent lives, saw its budget of over $2 billion cut by $16 million.

To some, that's a small price to pay for an attempt to balance the budget.

Gee, maybe if seasoned citizens didn't have to navigate the maze of the massive federal bureaucracy they could save a little money. Just a thought.

Seriously, though, a cut of $16 million out of a $2 billion budget is mean? Are they for real? That's a cut of less than one percent. If we can't even make the most insignificant of budget cuts, how can we ever possibly tackle the $14 trillion debt we're saddled with?

If anyone needs to cut their budget, it the idiots at CNN. They're paying people to come up with this drivel? And of all the ironies, Obama comes off like the one looking mean if we're to use CNN's own standard of meanness.

H/T.