Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Zuccotti Park Occupiers Having Their Wealth Redistributed: 'Stealing Is Our Biggest Problem at the Moment'

You're some idealistic nitwit who decides to be part of a movement so sleeping in a New York City park seems like a great way of showing you're part of the 0.99%. So imagine your surprise when you wake up and that very expensive laptop of yours is missing.
It’s a den of thieves!

Occupy Wall Street protesters said yesterday that packs of brazen crooks within their ranks have been robbing their fellow demonstrators blind, making off with pricey cameras, phones and laptops -- and even a hefty bundle of donated cash and food.

“Stealing is our biggest problem at the moment,” said Nan Terrie, 18, a kitchen and legal-team volunteer from Fort Lauderdale.

I had my Mac stolen -- that was like $5,500. Every night, something else is gone. Last night, our entire [kitchen] budget for the day was stolen, so the first thing I had to do was . . . get the message out to our supporters that we needed food!”

Crafty cat burglars sneaked into the makeshift kitchen at Zuccotti Park overnight and swiped as much as $2,500 in donated greenbacks from right under the noses of volunteers who’d fallen asleep after a long day whipping up meals for the hundreds of hungry protesters, the volunteers said.

“The worst thing is there’s people sleeping in the kitchen when they come, and they don’t even know about it! There are some really smart and sneaky thieves here,” Terrie said.

“I had umbrellas stolen, a fold-up bed I brought because my back is bad -- they took that, too!

Security volunteer Harry Wyman, 22, of Brooklyn was furious about the thievery -- and vowed to get tough with the predatory perps.

“I’m not getting paid, but I’m not gonna stand for it. Why people got to come here and do stupid stuff? All it does is make people not wanna come here anymore,” Wyman fumed.

At one point yesterday, Wyman and other volunteers briefly scuffled with a man who was standing near a park entrance with a pail calling out: “Donations! Donations!” -- and pocketing the cash people tossed in the bucket.
They should be happy that they're now paying their fair share. Who are they to have more than anyone else?

3 comments:

locomotivebreath1901 said...

Brutal irony alert!

Although, if the great unwashed mass of neo-bolsheviks are not happy with the situation, they could seek out the various cop cars they shat upon and ask the officers for help.

Blue Collar Todd said...

What 99%er has a $5000 laptop? We need to rail against this mythical number. 

Steve In Tulsa said...

Hilarious, they do not much care for it when it is their stuff getting 'redistributed'. They are begging to have some one 'spread the wealth' but when some one spreads their wealth they complain. They do not even see the irony.