Thursday, October 21, 2010

Bill Clinton Lost the Nuclear Codes After Lewinsky Scandal Broke: 'That's a Big Deal - a Gargantuan Deal'

Let's face it: When you're number one focus in life is chasing women and getting blowjobs, who has time to keep track of nuclear codes? It's not as if his administration was lax about our national security. Oh, wait...
Former President Bill Clinton lost the biscuit - a card with the codes needed to launch a nuclear attack - and couldn't find it for months, a former chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff has revealed.

"At one point during the Clinton administration," Gen. Hugh Shelton recalled, "the codes were actually missing for months. That's a big deal - a gargantuan deal," he told ABC World News.

Bubba's scary blunder is described in Shelton's just-published memoir, "Without Hesitation: The Odyssey of an American Warrior."

Shelton claims the story is new, but another military man told a similar account in his book seven years ago that included a possible excuse for Clinton's knuckleheadedness.

Ret. Air Force Lt. Col. Robert Patterson claims Clinton was asked to present the biscuit so it could be updated with a new one but couldn't find it.

It was the morning after the Monica Lewinsky scandal broke.

"He thought he just placed them upstairs," Patterson recalled.
Expect the requisite trashing of Shelton today.

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